I was just in the car and wondered to myself ‘How am I doing?’.  I do my best thinking in the car, which is a shame as I don’t really go anywhere in it much.  If I try and sit down and have a think about something important, my mind goes to mush unless I’m driving. Then the thoughts flow.

My answer, to myself, was…I’m not ok, but I’m ok with not being ok.  For now.

It’s become a massive cliche but ‘everything’ has changed. That change is only just starting to take shape. The future seems a very different place, to me. Uncertain and much less focused than the ideas I had about it six months ago. A lot of my fears pandemic-wise have abated and in part that has been due to my return to work.  They still creep up on me though. For instance, every time I see a bus full of face masks my blood runs cold.

Talking of work, I was sat in the clinic earlier contemplating the new set up, stripped back so that cleaning is quicker and touch points are eradicated and wondered what a new patient might be thinking when they walk in. I’ve always felt that the treatment room was a welcoming space, but now when they walk in the first thing they see is a stark metal sink surrounded by cleaning sprays and PPE notices.

‘It doesn’t need to be this way’ was my next thought.  I’ve figured out how to work as safely as possible, I’ve become accustomed to the new procedures and protocols to reduce touch, maintain distance and clean, quickly.

So, it was time for another re-work of the space to assimilate the change, but make it more welcoming and pleasing. As it turned out, that was pretty easy to do. It has been a relief that the practice is showing signs of recovery and new patients are booking and starting up their acupuncture experience. One of my greatest fears was that after twelve years of building the business up from nothing, it would all be lost. Fingers crossed.

So, what has all this reflection on my present situation this morning done for me?

1. Change happens. At different rates and different magnitudes. If I had written down everything I would have to experience over the last twelve months, it would have freaked the living daylights out of me. This leads on to..
2. We cope. It’s human to cope. We do it almost instinctively and that is how we have evolved. No matter how overwhelming something seems, after a few sleeps, we adjust and it becomes more manageable.
3. Huge change brings opportunity. This immense change has cleared the way for the new. Some of you know I was working on a side line last year growing and selling local flowers. That’s all gone now, partly due to the P word. Partly due to being able to take the time to reflect and realise it was fun, but it wasn’t exactly right. At first it stung to let it go, now it feels great and I’m excited at what may be next.
4. My attitude to my work has changed. I am now clearing more time for myself and getting my practice diary organised. Previously, I would basically leave my online diary wide open. That has been trimmed down to Wednesdays – Saturdays.
5. Keeping healthy is taking priority. Moving more, eating better, working on balancing my ‘midlife sleep issues’.
6. Letting things (and people) go.  If it ain’t working, it’s time to release the grasp. Repeating the same behaviours will likely not bring new outcomes.
7. Downsizing my day to day expectations. Maybe there is beauty in simplicity. Lockdown has meant life is smaller. So be it. I’m not wasting time pushing against it. Accept it.
8. Be more disciplined. My biggest challenge is working with myself. I am untidy and often disorganised. I am working daily to remedy this. Particularly the sodding kitchen!
9. Not knowing what is ahead is something I can accept. I was fooling myself that I had handle on the future anyway. We do it, but it’s a waste of time. It’s a security blanket and I’m a big boy now and my sucking cloth can be binned. So what if the future has fangs. I got through the last twelve months ok, I can do the next!
10. Ask for help, especially from more experienced people and professionals. Today I’m having a chat with a nutritionist. Outside input is valuable, it provides opportunity for new ideas and better outcomes.
11. People wearing face masks whilst riding their bikes, in the countryside, miles away from anyone, do not need my attention, I do not need to comment, I do not need to connect with that. They’ve got their way, I’ve got mine!

A lot has been turned on it’s head. I’m going to make it work for me. I’m going to work on it until it feels ok. It’s not perfect, but it’s progress! As the wonderful woman on my ‘F*ck It’ meditation keeps telling me.https://youtu.be/wnh9NmU_oKc

Over and out.

Peace brothers and sisters.

Alex

Hello!

How’s it going with you?

Anyone sick of hearing the phrase ‘unprecedented times’?

I guess there’s no way of getting away from it, things have changed. One thing I have realised is that in many ways being an acupuncturist has to some degree prepared me for these changes. By supporting others with their ‘ups and downs’ it’s given me insight on my own behaviour patterns, how to understand stress and how to move forward.

This time two weeks ago I was pretty much in meltdown.  It lasted about three days as I realised my income was ending and the life I took for granted had abruptly vanished.  The three key emotions I faced was anger, fear and frustration.  A pretty potent mix.

One of the fundamental laws of Five Element Acupuncture is ‘there is always change’. Whilst experiencing the ‘melt’ it was helpful to remember that those feelings would change and I knew from observing myself in the past that my negative feelings may come up regularly but they change pretty quickly, normally into positive actions.  I have now figured that negative emotion is now the beginning of something better, as long as I make it so.

When lockdown first started, I didn’t have a plan. To be fair I’m not much of a planner, I prefer to go with inspiration and be flexible, constantly assessing new information and then acting, there’s no master plan just a cluster of small, short term plans that generally move me in the right direction on reflection.

In the second week of lockdown, I started to notice the following list forming to help me move forward in a positive way.  Without fear, anger or frustration.  Maybe you’ve read about most of them elsewhere but if just one of these helps someone, then it’s worth the twenty minutes it’s taken to write them out..

Control what you can and forget the rest – seriously, forget it!  There’s loads we could stress about at present. What’s the use? NONE.  Be proactive, take positive actions, protect yourself, then chill out.  Let the stress go, work with what you’ve got.  Maybe this time is important for us to decide what it is we want in life and when the time is right, act on it.

Watch your narrative – this is make or break! The story you tell yourself about yourself and your place in the world is important. Two weeks ago mine was ‘I’m going to be poor and pointless’  Frankly, what ********! I decided that ‘I can overcome adversity one step at a time’ was a far better narrative.  Rather than being a victim of circumstance, I was going to make circumstance work for me. There’s now so much I want to do during lockdown I haven’t got time for a pity party. This led me on to…

Create a new routine – humans thrive with routine. It’s fair to say humans generally benefit from some structure and routine to feel safe and secure.  This routine should be based on positive, self caring, supportive routine as far as possible, not a humdrum one.  This has been the greatest struggle for me so far.  It was useful to realise this early on.  Now, I’m up and at it each day without even having to think, by…

Exercising each day – before I even get chance to think in the morning I am getting up and getting out for an 8000 step walk.  I get up super early to avoid other people (no offence) and get it out the way.  I’m not a natural ‘exerciser’ and find jumping around in front of Joe Wicks on Youtube boring. However, walking for me is different as there is so much to see out there that I normally thunder past in the car.

I noticed immediately that these 8000 steps utterly transformed my mood. It also motivates me, something that I can struggle with.  I feel lighter, clearer minded, happier, more content and ready to be productive with the rest of my day.  By the time I really wake up in the morning I’m already 4000 steps in and this feels good!  This morning my walk made me realise this lockdown is an opportunity to…

Expand my consciousness – rather than having a long list of things to get done this morning I was totally present, in the moment, thanks to the birds! I suddenly became aware that I could hear the skylarks out by the ring road. This was an exciting moment.

I’ve done this walk many times before but my mind was full of other stuff and I simply yomped past without noticing.  WHAT A WASTE.  From noticing the Skylarks I then noticed there were Lapwings and it went from there until I was pretty much fully absorbed in the landscape.  This felt amazing. To be part of something much wider, noticing more, expanding my conscious mind to my surroundings rather than a truck load of unnecessary mental trivia.

Try something new, regularly – this helps keep our brains elastic, ready for change and interested.  So far, I’ve done ten online jigsaws (who knew I’d find them so relaxing), I’ve tuned into the radio, normally music around the house irritates me, now I love it and it also helps with my routine as I’ve begun sitting down with John Suchet on Classic FM at 11:30am for a cup of tea.  I’ve also reconnected with my childhood by switching on Heart ’70s!  In addition I am teaching myself how to grow veg, on Pinterest, as a cheap option to feeding myself, healthily.

Stop multitasking – this is utter luxury. Instead of spinning all the plates to keep two businesses running and a home etc, I’m just doing single tasks and concentrating on them.  It was difficult at first as I keep feeling that I need to be rushing onto the next thing but now, I don’t.  Lockdown has given me the sense of having more time.  Better organisation in the future, when things return to normal, can help me maintain this feeling and stop the unnecessary mental race.

Be helpful – this one I have yet to conquer! Helping others makes you feel useful, part of something, less isolated and content.  As yet, I haven’t figured how to be of use.  I feel confident that once this massive gear change has settled in that I will figure this one out. Being helpful, from a distance, seems like a challenge.

On a final note I have also accepted that if there’s a day when none of this can help, well shucks, that’s fine too. I don’t know what’s ahead but this list is a start to help me deal with what ever it may be.  I hope that some of these utterances may help you. I’d be interested to hear how you are tackling this new situation.  Drop me a note…

STOP PRESS: on a practical note, Vitamin D has been shown to significantly help the body fight virus infections.  Most of us will be deficient. I regularly take a Vitamin D spray. You may wish to research this yourself and get one ordered for delivery.

Well that got your attention. You are possibly thinking I am about to spin you a tale about oiled-up Japanese warriors in uncomfortable undies imparting some great piece of life advice regarding sumo and acupuncture. Not quite. I’m talking about the other SUMO…

Shut Up, Move On.

I can’t clearly remember when SUMO exactly entered my life. It was around the time I was working in Cornwall on an ‘arms-length’ project with Caradon District Council. We were a very small team that was charged with creating a new service to help people in crisis. It was a complicated and frustrating process as well as highly rewarding and frankly, a bit of a laugh. As a team we used ‘SUMO’ a great deal when various economic, procedural and colleague issues arose. We had to, there was no time for sitting and dwelling on our numerous operational problems, we had to deliver for clients and funders.

Since those days I’ve used SUMO to help weather the things in life that are sent to test. I regularly tell my patients to SUMO and it proves to be a liberating mantra when we get caught up in lifes’ trials.

I still have the privilege of working with people in crisis. As I am sure you are aware, acupuncture is more than just a pain treatment. I firmly believe it helps nourish the human spirit also. How? I’m not entirely sure exactly how, but I see it happen all the time. Mostly it’s receiving support from someone who is on your side, listens without judgement and can be trusted. In combination, the needle part then allows the body to relax and the mind absorb new perspectives. Frankly, I do not spend too much time over thinking the ‘how’, more the ‘how can I do it better’ for the next patient through the door.

The crises we face vary greatly, but some of the things we can employ to help mitigate them do not. I have put together a hit-list of things we can do to SUMO when things get tough. It is a list as much for myself as it is for any other. I genuinely use these tips day to day.

When the going gets tough, try these..

• Use mantras. I do this all the time, with my fav being SUMO. I also use ‘I choose peace’ if feeling anxious and ‘F*ck It!’ if frustrated. I say them out loud as a constant reminder to break negativity and try and take a better path in my mind.
• Watch who you spend time with. Do they radiate positivity or spread doom? Minimise the doom-mongers if you are feeling off.
• Get rest and breathe. Deep breaths help release tension, feed the brain oxygen and lower heart rate, overall making you feel more chilled.
• Axe the unnecessary. When you are up against it, cut out the unnecessary activities. Crisis can bring along a lot of extra work and so some of the regular tasks need axing. It is not possible to ‘do it all’, so don’t even try. Prioritise, by making a list of the most urgent and necessary tasks.
• Asking for help is a skill that few people possess during difficult times. Have some compassion for yourself and let others muck in. In most cases helping others is a rewarding experience, give them a chance to feel useful.
• Flip-think. This is a new one I am learning about. It kind of falls into the ‘silver-lining’ Ven diagram of disaster! Instead of concentrating on the downside to the crisis, thinking about what this time of perceived turmoil might be bringing in terms of new possibilities, new paths, new opportunities, reviewing existing plans, meeting new people, learning about yourself and others.
• Guillotine the guilt. Humans seem to be drawn to guilt. It creeps into all kinds of situations and takes hold without us even realising. Take time to try and recognise its’ existence. Analyse why you are feeling it, then cut its’ flaming head off. Guilt is mostly a total waste of time. It’s often a self centred emotion that tries to make everything about us. Well, newsflash, unless you have done something truly vile to someone else, it’s a waste of time. If you have done something vile, then tough. Maybe this dose of guilt will teach you to be a better person!
• Try and laugh. Seeing the lighter side of life can be a real tonic and humour helps us put things into proper perspective and enables us to deal with tough stuff. Seeing the lighter side is not disrespectful, but a way of diffusing intense emotions. Have a little titter with trusted friends, just be careful who you do it in front of! Raucous laughter at the expense of others can be damaging, so have tact.
• Put the kettle on. Make tea. Be British. When it all comes down to it, a nice calm brew can work wonders. Plus, it’s what we British do best.